Stop the Cheating; Save the Democracy

Folks, Is it really a Democracy?

It was the last few seconds of the last quarter of the game. The home team was behind one field goal, 9 to 7. It was a hard fought game and the home team’s perfect record was on the line; they were in possession on the 40 yard line. The fans were hoarse from cheering every play, every interception and fumble and every nuance of the game for an hour of grueling combat. The center hikes the ball, the quarterback falls back, avoids a tackle and launches the ball high and long into the end zone. Eight arms go up, eight pairs of hands grapple blindly for a piece of the leather missile but only one hand tightens fingers around the laces and brings the ball down to chest level with six hands trying to shake the ball loose or take possession on the way down. The home team scores! Game over 13 -9 and the clock says no time for another play. But wait…Ref reverses call…Nine bookies just resuscitated go back into cardiac arrest…Home team loses…3,000,000 fans and the entire home team got it wrong. The game was decided in a smoke filled room two hours before kickoff.

Before the debate season Americans were beginning to show concern over voter fraud. People were shocked to learn that our votes are counted in Spain; well actually in Greece but the company is headquartered in Spain. Makes sense, Spain is a model of democracy in the free world, just like Greece. Can SCYTL scuttle the election? The top law enforcement officer in America is working up a sweat defending the rights of illegal aliens and poor folk not to be required to have a voter registration with picture I.D. These people are camera shy I suppose and if they don’t have a driver’s license it is almost impossible to vote early and often. States that require proof of eligibility are sued…During the Republican primaries one district misplaced all the votes but didn’t think it was a big enough deal to report the loss until the following morning. In 2000 a national election hung by a Florida chad; the loser cried foul. He cheated like hell and had nothing to show for it.

The 9th District Court of Appeals rules in favor of fair elections…next time…Venezuelans voted in record numbers against the winner…Its not who votes that counts…

Once the campaigns heated up and the ping pong syndrome set in the American ADD public lost interest in who’s cheating and how and is now heavily invested in the candidates. Obama has the incumbent advantage…oops! Mitt brought his A game…personable, friendly, prepared, knowledgeable…oops!!! Liar! liar! pants on fire! Biden will get the ball back…that’s a laugh…the king of gaff vs. the rookie…Ryan’s only been in Congress 14 years; how will he hold up against the king of comedy? Pretty well it turns out….Here comes the real Obama…Mitt’s in for it now…no cake walk tonight…Besides Barak didn’t spend his formative years in the Holy Grail of crooked politics for nothing…he’ll win fair and square tonight even if he has to cheat! So help him Chicago!

So what can we expect come November? Obama’s not giving up on his golf game. He knows that four more years will require he up his game and stay sharp. He speaks in code to supporters who may be losing faith…”we’ve come too far to turn back now” he bravely exhorts the machine that put him where he is…besides Michele wants to go back to Spain and personally thank the people who count the votes.

Here’s the real poop. Obama wouldn’t come in third in an honest election but he doesn’t plan on losing. So once again let’s connect the dots. He has a war chest that surpasses even his boldest projections and sure enough he’s holding record breaking fund raisers just when you think he’s achieving room temperature. Remember way back even before we were thinking about the cheating factor when Obama told us he would have a billion dollar campaign fund? Remember how much of our hard earned dough he gave to bankrupt companies that are lining up to declare bankruptcy even as we speak? Nobody in their right mind invests in companies that project failure on the books while they have their hand out…off the books…if you get my drift. Hell some of these companies didn’t even have to ask. Here’s a coinkadink! Foreign money is appearing like fog on a bog at dawn in the Spring and they hardly have to ask for it. God is good…I mean Allah is…

Pray God we are not the Venezuela of the Norte…If we turn out in record numbers chances are we will vote for the winner…Even a billion dollar slush fund will have trouble fixing a landslide… Make sure the spread is too hot to handle. Get out there and vote! You go and take your housekeeper with you.

Its not a democracy if your vote doesn’t count.

God bless America,



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